I finally bought a pair of those trendy wide-leg pants everyone's raving about, thinking I'd look effortlessly chic.

Instead, I just look like I'm smuggling two very confused, very fluffy dogs under my clothes.

I went on a date with a guy who said he was a 'foodie' on his profile

But it turned out his culinary expertise was just eating an entire pizza by himself and calling it 'research'

He told me he’s 'so over' all the superficiality and fake stuff on social media.

His last Instagram post was a picture of him holding a single coffee mug, staring contemplatively out a window, with the caption '#deepthoughts #morningvibes #unfiltered.'

I've started using a productivity app that tracks my daily habits and goals, and it's been really helpful, except for one thing:

it still can't account for the 3 hours I spend each day mentally rehearsing conversations I'll never actually have.