We thought we were being frugal by having the wedding at home

Until we had to take out a second mortgage to accommodate the guest list and the therapist for my mother-in-law

Planning the wedding seating chart felt less like arranging guests for a meal...

...and more like an advanced game of Tetris, where every piece was a family member with an opinion.

I tried to surprise my wife with a grand romantic gesture the other night.

I did all the dishes. She just looked at me and said, 'Are you implying something about my dish-loading technique?'

I remember asking [Groom's Name] a while back what he was really looking for in a lifelong partner.

He said, 'Someone who understands me, loves me unconditionally, and occasionally won't judge me for eating cereal for dinner.' I think he found all three in [Bride's Name].