I've learned that marriage is all about finding creative ways to ask for permission

like 'Honey, can I watch the game tonight?' which really means 'Can I watch the game tonight without ruining my life?'

We wanted a small, intimate wedding.

Then we tried to trim the guest list and realized our definition of 'immediate family' included second cousins twice removed and everyone we'd ever met in line for coffee.

We decided to have an open bar at our wedding to keep our families happy

Now we're just hoping to have enough money left for the honeymoon, or even a marriage

I love how marriage is all about finding common ground

now my wife and I both agree that the other person is hogging the blankets