I was going to ask the turkey for its opinion on the Thanksgiving menu...

...but I figured it would just give me a lot of gobble-dygook.

Why did the cranberry sauce blush?

Because it saw the turkey dressing!

The biggest mystery at our Thanksgiving dinner isn't how Aunt Martha made that gelatin salad.

It's whether the turkey or my cousin started crying first after someone asked about his career choices.

Why did the turkey get kicked off the football team?

Because it kept *fowl*ing up the plays!