My new barber asked me how I wanted my head.

I told him I like it when he really works it over and leaves it feeling good.

My girlfriend told me she wanted me to be more passionate and put more effort into our sex life.

I told her, 'Baby, I'm putting in all the effort *I've got*. You want more, you gotta start paying me.'

I've been dating a professional geologist, and she's been teaching me about the different types of rocks and how they're formed.

But honestly, I'm more interested in the fault lines in her personality and how they affect our relationship.

I've been dating a woman who's a professional architect, and she's always trying to redesign our relationship.

But honestly, I think she's just trying to build a better orgasm.