I've been dating a girl who's a professional mirroring coach, and she's always trying to get me to reflect on our relationship.

But honestly, it's just a lot of self-reflection and I'm not sure I'm ready to face myself in the morning.

My dentist told me I needed a deep cleaning.

I told him I thought he was only interested in my teeth.

I went on a date with a woman who said she was looking for a man who could 'go all night long'.

I told her I could definitely stay awake for eight hours, but she seemed less impressed when I clarified I meant binge-watching a documentary about competitive cheese rolling.

My wife was complaining about our plumbing last night. She said something about needing a man who could really handle a pipe, get deep down, and know how to screw things tight to stop the leaking.

So I called a plumber, and he'll be here Monday.