I'm not arguing that Valentine's Day is overrated, but

I just think it's a holiday created by florists and jewelers to make singles feel like they're in a real-life game of 'Monopoly' – paying rent, but no one's getting a free park.

Are you a Valentine's Day conversation heart?

Because you're making my heart skip a beat, and I think we'd be a match made in candy heaven

Are you a calendar?

Because I'd love to date you, but I really need to check my schedule first.

What did the chocolate bar say to its crush?

I think we're mint to be together!