So I was at the museum with my kids, and we saw an exhibit on ancient Egypt. The kids were fascinated by the mummies and the pyramids, and we started learning about pharaohs and their tombs. I asked the tour guide if they had found any interesting artifacts recently

and he said they had uncovered a lot of old 'wrap'!

I'm shell-shocked by how much I spent on seashells at the beach today

Why did the pencil go to the party?

To draw attention to itself.

What do you call a fake noodle?

An impasta!