So I was at the park with my kids, and we saw a guy playing fetch with his dog, but the dog wasn't bringing the ball back. Instead, it was just running around in circles, looking really confused. The owner was getting frustrated, so I decided to ask him what was wrong

and he said his dog was paws-itive it was a fetch-failure

My dog is a terrible poker player because he always shows his paws.

Why did the bicycle fall over?

Because it was two tired!

Did you hear about the fire at the circus?

The tents were intense.