I thought I knew my family well before planning our wedding.

Turns out, some relatives are like volatile chemicals; best kept in separate containers on the seating chart.

Before [Bride's Name] came along, [Groom's Name]'s five-year plan mostly involved saving up for a new gaming console or perhaps a slightly less dented car.

Now, his vision for the future includes things like joint bank accounts, matching towels, and figuring out the optimal feng shui for their spice rack.

I was talking to the happy couple about their future plans

and I realized marriage is like a GPS: it starts with a clear direction, but after a few years, it's just a voice saying 'recalculating' over and over again

My wife and I have been married for ten years and we still share a closet.

By 'share,' I mean her clothes live *in* the closet, and mine live *on* that one chair in the bedroom.