I went to the doctor and said I had a problem with my ears.

He said, 'Don't worry, it's just a hollow feeling.'

Your mom asked me to try and fix the coffee maker this morning, because it was really slow and sputtering. I tinkered with it for a bit, but it just wouldn't cooperate.

I guess it was still trying to perk up.

What do you call a lazy kangaroo? A pouch potato!

Why couldn't the bicycle stand up by itself?

It was two tired!