We hired a wedding planner to help us stay organized and on budget.

Now we just need to hire a therapist to deal with the wedding planner.

I've known the groom for many years, and I've seen him prepare for many challenges, but nothing could have prepared him for marriage.

But in all fairness, I think the only thing he's more committed to than the bride is his fantasy football league.

I've learned that marriage is all about finding creative ways to ask for permission

like, 'Honey, can I turn the thermostat down?' is actually just code for 'Can I still be in charge of something?'

I thought I knew my family well before planning our wedding.

Turns out, some relatives are like volatile chemicals; best kept in separate containers on the seating chart.