Why did the escort bring a ladder on her date?

She wanted to take things to the next level.

I asked my financial advisor what the key to long-term satisfaction was.

He just sighed and said, 'Honestly, it's usually over too soon.'

I've been dating a girl who's really into role-playing in the bedroom

But honestly, I'm getting a little tired of being the defendant

Why did the man name his dick 'Cashew'?

Because every time he got excited, it went nuts.