I've been working really hard to build my personal brand.

Turns out my personal brand is just 'tired.'

My parents always told me to follow my dreams.

Now my dreams are just about affording groceries that aren't on sale.

I just turned the age my parents were when they bought their first house.

I just hit 'add to cart' on a new houseplant.

I've been practicing mindfulness in therapy to manage my anxiety

now I'm aware of every thought, including the one that says I'm still not doing the dishes