Are you a Valentine's Day time capsule?

Because you're someone I'd love to unwrap years from now.

Are you a Valentine's Day coupon?

Because you're redeemable in my heart and I want to cash in on our love

I'm not single on Valentine's Day, I'm just

in a long-distance relationship with my couch and Netflix.

Why did the candy store owner love Valentine's Day?

Because it was a sweetheart of a deal.