Why did the rose go to the party on Valentine's Day?

Because it was a blooming good time

I've been trying to find the perfect Valentine's Day gift

but it's hard when the only person I'm shopping for is my cat, and all she wants is tuna

If you were a vegetable, you'd be a cute-cumber.

But since it's Valentine's Day, I'd say you're a *sweet* potato!

Some people spend Valentine's Day searching for their soulmate.

I'm just trying to decide if my soulmate is the pizza delivery guy or the remote control.