My parents always told me to follow my dreams.

Now my dreams are just about affording groceries that aren't on sale.

I'm really trying to plan for the future.

My long-term plan is just to survive long enough to see the next season of whatever I'm binging.

My therapist asked me what my biggest fantasy was.

I told her: a 40-hour work week.

I asked my manager why our meeting couldn't have been an email

And they said 'because then we wouldn't have had the opportunity to synergize our thought processes and disrupt the paradigm of traditional communication'