We added up the costs of the venue, food, and decorations for our wedding

And realized we could've just bought a small island and eloped

My fiancé started out calm and collected during wedding planning.

Now she refers to the caterers as 'the culinary saboteurs' and believes the florists are part of a secret anti-bridal society.

We wanted a small, intimate wedding.

Then we tried to trim the guest list and realized our definition of 'immediate family' included second cousins twice removed and everyone we'd ever met in line for coffee.

I've always thought marriage is a lot like a co-op video game.

You start off with your own individual objectives, then you quickly realize the only way to beat the level is to combine your resources, share the loot, and occasionally sacrifice your own character for the greater good – usually by letting your partner have the last slice of pizza.