Why did the Yeti get kicked out of the coffee shop?

Because it was caught abominably hogging the WiFi

Why did the cyclops get excited about his new job at the optometrist's office?

Because he had a vision for his career!

Why did the trick-or-treater cross the road?

To get to the other sweet side!

Why did the vampire go to the hair salon?

Because he wanted a bloody good haircut.