I'm starting to think Valentine's Day is just a social experiment

to see how many people will willingly pay triple for flowers and dinner

Do you have a valentine yet?

Because I'd love to be your ghoul-friend and have a bloody good time on Valentine's Day

They say Cupid's arrow is supposed to strike you with love on Valentine's Day.

Mine must have taken a detour and hit my Amazon cart instead. Because I'm deeply in love with two-day shipping.

I've been trying to find my perfect match on dating apps

but so far, it's just been a series of swipes, disappointment, and proof that my friends were wrong when they said I'm a catch