💘 Valentine's Joke
Anti-ValentineSaturday, June 6, 2026
People always ask me what my significant other is getting me for Valentine's Day.
My significant other is Amazon Prime, and they're getting me whatever I put in my cart at 2 AM last Tuesday.
More Valentine's Jokes
Are you Earl Grey?
Because you're a hot-tea... but I prefer hot chocolate on Valentine's Day.
Did it hurt when you fell from heaven?
Because you just landed on my foot, and I'm pretty sure I heard something crack.
My Valentine's Day plans are pretty romantic, actually.
It involves me, a blanket, and a very serious, committed relationship with my takeout menu.
Do you have a map?
Because I keep getting lost in your eyes... and now I'm aimlessly wandering through the Valentine's Day candy aisle.
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