We hired a wedding planner to help us stay within budget

Now we're broke, but at least the wedding is perfectly planned

Before we got married, my husband used to send me flowers and chocolates every week.

Now, if he brings home the *right* kind of toilet paper without being asked, I know it's true love.

We found the perfect wedding venue – historical, elegant, and had beautiful gardens.

Then they told us the price, and suddenly a picnic blanket in the park seemed like a very viable 'rustic chic' option.

I've learned that marriage is all about finding creative ways to ask for permission

like saying 'honey, can I watch the game?' when what I really mean is 'can I ignore you for three hours?'