I told my dad I was getting him a new gadget for Father's Day to help him with his grilling

Now he's saucier than the BBQ sauce

I found an old letter I wrote to my dad when I was a kid, and it said, 'Dad, I love you more than pizza.'

He said that's still the highest praise he's ever received.

My dad's idea of retail therapy...

...is walking through the hardware store, picking up random bolts and muttering, 'I'll need this someday.'

My dad's favorite Father's Day tradition is

spending the whole day in the backyard, not because he loves the family gathering, but because it's the one day a year he can use the lawn as an excuse to buy a new lawn mower.