I'm celebrating Valentine's Day this year by

reorganizing my Netflix queue into 'alone and happy' categories.

I've been trying to find the perfect Valentine's Day gift

but it's like searching for a needle in a haystack, or in my case, a needle in a sea of singles

Why did Cupid's arrow go to therapy?

Because it had a lot of 'pointed' issues to work through.

My Valentine's Day plans are pretty elaborate.

First, I'm making dinner for two. Then I'm eating both servings.