My Valentine's Day plans are pretty romantic, actually.

It involves me, a blanket, and a very serious, committed relationship with my takeout menu.

Are you a candle?

Because you light up my life... and also, I'm pretty sure you're dripping wax on the tablecloth.

Why did the heart go to the doctor on Valentine's Day?

Because it had a few heartaches to work through and wanted a love-ly checkup

Do you have a valentine yet?

Because I'd love to be your ghoul-friend and have a bloody good time on Valentine's Day