I've been trying to find my perfect match on dating apps

but so far, it's just been a series of swipes, disappointment, and proof that my friends were wrong when they said I'm a catch

I'm reading a book on Valentine's Day traditions

Apparently, it's all about love, romance, and pretending to like overpriced dinners.

Why did the chocolate go to therapy on Valentine's Day?

Because it was feeling a little melted under the pressure

Are you a Valentine's Day conversation heart?

Because you're making my heart skip a beat, and I think we'd be a match made in candy heaven