I've noticed that since getting married, my wife and I have started to

finish each other's arguments.

My wife and I used to have long, romantic conversations every night when we were dating.

Now, our deepest late-night discussions usually revolve around whose turn it is to start the dishwasher.

I've learned that marriage is all about finding creative ways to ask for permission

like, 'Honey, can I turn the thermostat down?' is actually just code for 'Can I still be in charge of something?'

We thought we'd found the perfect wedding venue

until we realized the 'romantic garden' was actually just the groundskeeper's enthusiastic weed collection