Are you a heart?

Because you're absolutely vital for pumping blood throughout my circulatory system.

Why did the rose go to the party on Valentine's Day?

Because it was a blooming good time

Are you a Valentine's Day heart-shaped balloon?

Because you're inflating my expectations of love and I don't want you to pop out of my life.

I've been trying to find my perfect match on dating apps

but so far, it's just been a series of swipes, disappointment, and proof that my friends were wrong when they said I'm a catch