I've been dating a girl who's really into role-playing in the bedroom

But honestly, I'm getting a little tired of being the defendant

I've been dating a botanist, and she's been teaching me about the art of cultivation.

Apparently, I've been nurturing a weed.

My new barber asked me how I wanted my head.

I told him I like it when he really works it over and leaves it feeling good.

I've been dating a girl who's really into polyamory, and I have to say, it's been a real learning experience.

Now I know what it's like to be in a relationship, a backup plan, and a participation trophy all at the same time.