I've been practicing my Valentine's Day skills

by lovingly cooking a solo meal, and then arguing with myself over who left the dishes in the sink

Are you a Valentine's Day rose?

Because you're a little prickly, but I'm still stuck on you

My Valentine's Day plans usually involve a very specific type of bouquet.

A pizza box, surrounded by breadsticks.

Is it hot in here, or is it just you?

Because my Valentine's chocolates are melting faster than my romantic expectations.