I went on a date with a guy who said he's 'really into old movies' and 'loves reading classic literature'

But when I asked him about his favorite book, he said 'uh, The Notebook' and I realized he's been getting his literary credentials from his ex's Netflix queue

I went on a date with a guy who said he was 'really into photography'

His camera roll was 90% selfies and 10% poorly lit meals

I went on a date with a guy who said he was a 'foodie' on his profile

But it turned out his culinary expertise was just eating an entire pizza by himself and calling it 'research'

I was having a particularly mundane day, so I decided to spice things up

I started narrating my trip to the DMV, complete with a dramatic voiceover and an imaginary film score – 'As she waited in line, the clock ticked away, each passing minute a reminder that her destiny was being held hostage by a bureaucratic abyss'