I'm starting to think that Valentine's Day is just a social experiment

to see how many people we can convince to pay triple for flowers and dinner

I've been trying to find my perfect match on dating apps

but so far, it's just been a series of swipes, disappointment, and proof that my friends were wrong when they said I'm a catch

I've been trying to find the perfect Valentine's Day gift

but it's like searching for a needle in a haystack, or in my case, a needle in a sea of singles

Are you a Valentine's Day rose?

Because you're making my heart grow a petal-fect love for you