I told my friend I was planning a romantic Valentine's Day dinner

for one, with a movie, a pizza, and a strongly worded letter to my fridge for being empty

Why did the chocolate go to therapy on Valentine's Day?

Because it was feeling a little melted under the pressure

Some people spend Valentine's Day searching for their soulmate.

I'm just trying to decide if my soulmate is the pizza delivery guy or the remote control.

Why did the chocolate go on a date?

It was looking for its truffle mate.