They say Valentine's Day is all about celebrating 'great love stories.'

Mine involves me, my couch, and a truly epic streaming marathon. It's the most committed relationship I've ever had.

Why did the cookie go to the doctor on Valentine's Day?

Because it felt crumby and wanted a sweet diagnosis

I'm not single on Valentine's Day, I'm just

in a long-distance relationship with my couch and Netflix.

Why did the heart go to the art museum on Valentine's Day?

Because it was a masterpiece of love