My girlfriend asked me to help her with a new recipe last night. She said it needed a lot of careful preparation, a firm grip, and then I really had to beat it hard until it was stiff and peaked, ready for her to spread it out and enjoy.

Turns out she was just making meringue.

They say men fantasize about having sex with multiple women.

And women fantasize about having sex with *one* man who doesn't need directions.

My IT guy told me my computer was running slow.

He said I needed to free up some space on my drive, because a full hard drive always has trouble getting things up.

I just started a new job at a bakery, and my boss is very particular about how I handle the dough.

He says I need to come in early, work it hard and fast until it's really stiff, then get it warm and moist so it can rise properly.