Are you a Valentine's card?

Because you're covered in glitter... and now my whole house is too.

Why did the rose go to the party on Valentine's Day?

Because it was a blooming good time

Valentine's Day is when everyone celebrates finding their 'better half'.

I'm celebrating my 'better *alone* half' – the one who gets the whole couch and doesn't have to share snacks.

Why did the chocolate chip cookie go on a date?

Because it was looking for a sweet relationship