Are you a Valentine's Day time capsule?

Because you're someone I'd love to unwrap years from now.

People always ask me what my significant other is getting me for Valentine's Day.

My significant other is Amazon Prime, and they're getting me whatever I put in my cart at 2 AM last Tuesday.

I'm celebrating Valentine's Day this year by

reorganizing my Netflix queue into 'lonely nights' and 'even lonelier nights' categories.

What did the rose say to its Valentine?

I'm pollen in love with you!