My financial advisor told me I really needed to diversify my assets.

I told him, 'Don't worry, I already have a very well-rounded portfolio.'

My girlfriend just got into competitive eating.

She said she loves to loosen her jaw and really open wide for the biggest challenges.

I've been dating a girl who's a cartographer, and she's always trying to map out our relationship.

I guess you could say she's looking for a little more territory to explore.

I went to a fancy wine tasting last night, and the sommelier was very particular about how we should enjoy the wine.

She kept saying, 'Swirl it gently, get your nose deep in the glass, and take a long, satisfying swallow.'