I've been taking private lessons from a skilled fencing instructor, and she's been teaching me how to make a strong point, penetrate my opponent's defense, and finish with a satisfying thrust.

My golf instructor told me I really needed to work on my follow-through.

I told him my wife usually has a few complaints about my finish.

I've been dating a girl who's a sex therapist, and she's always trying to diagnose our problems in the bedroom.

But honestly, I think she's just trying to bill me by the hour.

I've been dating a girl who's really into astrology, and she told me our love was written in the stars.

But honestly, I think our love life is more like a lunar cycle – it's all about the phases, and sometimes it's just a dark void for weeks.