I asked my financial advisor what the key to long-term satisfaction was.

He just sighed and said, 'Honestly, it's usually over too soon.'

My girlfriend just bought a new pressure cooker.

She says she loves all the build-up, and then a good, controlled release.

My golf instructor told me I needed to loosen my grip, adjust my stance, and really follow through with my shaft for a better shot.

I've been learning how to make the perfect soufflé from a French chef

She says the key is to beat it until it rises, then take it out before it falls