I love how some skincare products claim to be 'anti-aging' as if they're not just delaying the inevitable

I went on a date with a guy who said he was a 'minimalist'

His apartment had 12 video game consoles and a signed poster of himself

I went to the grocery store to pick up some milk, but as I was walking down the aisle, I felt the urge to add some flair to my shopping experience.

So, I started voicing my inner monologue out loud, 'I'll just grab this gallon of 2%... the choice of a woman who's given up on love, but still holds on to hope... and also needs cereal for the week.'

I matched with a guy on a dating app whose bio said he was looking for 'someone who can keep up'.

My main hobbies are doomscrolling and wondering if I locked the front door. I think I'm gonna need a head start.