🔥 Top Rated Dirty Jokes

I've been dating a girl who's really into polyamory, and I have to say, it's been a real learning experience.

I've been taking classes to improve my thrusting technique, and my instructor says I have a lot of potential for deep development.

Why did the couple bring a magnet on their anniversary date?

I've been dating a sex therapist, and I have to say, she's always trying to get to the root of the problem.

Why did the escort bring a ladder on her date?

My pottery instructor told me I really needed to work on my handling skills.

I've been taking private dance lessons from a professional instructor, and she's been teaching me about the importance of proper mounting and dismounting techniques.

I've been dating a professional librarian, and she's been teaching me about the importance of cataloging and shelving our desires.

I've been dating a professional archer, and she's been teaching me about the art of precision and follow-through.

I've been dating a professional cartographer, and she's been teaching me how to navigate our relationship.

My girlfriend told me she wanted our relationship to 'evolve,' to 'reach new heights' and 'explore uncharted territory.'

I've been taking private lessons from a professional fencer, and she's been teaching me about the importance of parrying and riposting in a tight spot.

I was helping my neighbor prepare her garden last weekend. She said we needed to get down on our knees, really open up the soil, and plant some fresh seeds deep into the fertile ground. She even said the longer and harder we worked, the better the yield would be.

My girlfriend asked me to fix a really stubborn clog in the shower last night. I had to get down on my knees, work it hard and deep with a long, flexible rod, and really thrust it in until it finally came loose.

My new fitness trainer is really intense. She says the key to a great session is to get really low, push hard against resistance, and focus on those long, deep thrusts for maximum benefit.

I've been taking cooking classes with a professional pastry chef, and she's been teaching me about the importance of beating, whipping, and creaming to get the perfect rise.

My neighbor, who's a master gardener, told me the key to a thriving patch...

I've been dating a professional gemologist, and she's been teaching me about the importance of clarity and brilliance in our relationship.

I've been dating a professional photographer, and she's always trying to develop our relationship.

My new riding instructor is very particular. She says the key to a good performance is a firm grip, finding your rhythm, and really working your hips into the saddle.

My girlfriend told me she loves foreplay.

I've been dating a professional geologist, and she's been teaching me about the importance of excavation and getting to the core of our relationship.

I've been dating a mathematician, and she's always trying to find the common denominator in our relationship.

I've been dating a professional chocolatier, and she's been teaching me about the art of molding relationships.

My girlfriend told me she wanted to go on a really wild adventure in bed.

I've been dating a botanist, and she's been teaching me about the art of cultivation.

I've been dating a clockmaker, and she's always trying to wind me up

My friend, who's a master woodworker, told me the key to a really strong joint...

I've been dating a professional taxidermist, and she's been teaching me about the importance of stuffing and mounting

I've been dating a professional upholsterer, and she's been teaching me how to reupholster our love life.

My dad took me fishing for the first time last weekend.

I've been dating a librarian, and she's very particular about our love life.

I've been taking private lessons from a skilled fencing instructor, and she's been teaching me how to make a strong point, penetrate my opponent's defense, and finish with a satisfying thrust.

My friend, who's a professional trombonist, was telling me about the key to a really great performance. He said you have to get a firm grip on the slide, push and pull it with power and precision, and really blow hard and deep to make it sing.

I've been dating a woman who's a professional architect, and she's always trying to redesign our relationship.

My golf instructor told me I needed to loosen my grip, adjust my stance, and really follow through with my shaft for a better shot.

I went to a fancy wine tasting last night, and the sommelier was very particular about how we should enjoy the wine.

I've been dating a girl who's a professional cryptologist, and she's always trying to crack my code

I've been dating a girl who's a professional cartographer, and she's always trying to help me find my way

I've been learning how to make the perfect soufflé from a French chef

I've been seeing a professional massage therapist to work out some knots, and she's been teaching me how to apply the right amount of pressure, get deep into the muscle, and finish with a happy ending.

I've been taking private lessons from a skilled arborist, and she's been teaching me how to prune with precision, really get to the root of the problem, and help me branch out in new ways.

My new photography teacher told me I really need to get a good grip on my equipment, keep my lens steady, find the perfect angle, and focus on getting a deep, satisfying shot.

My girlfriend told me she wanted something for her birthday that she could ride all night long.

My financial advisor told me I need to be more aggressive with my assets...

My new nutritionist told me to make sure I get a good, deep swallow with every meal.

I've been seeing a physical therapist who specializes in rehabilitation

My new Pilates instructor told me I need to really engage my core, get deep into my pelvic floor, and then slowly release it with control.

I've been taking private lessons from a beautiful glassblower, and she's been teaching me how to shape something delicate, get a good grip, and blow it all out of proportion.

I've been taking private dance lessons from a beautiful instructor, and she's been teaching me how to grind with precision, really thrust my hips, and make every move count.